Guess What Sucks

   Hey you wanna hear what dirty balls taste like? Well, down Mexico way they call it “Oye Como Va”. That’s right folks. I’m talking about the one, the only. Carlos Santana…

and he SUCKS.

This poor son of a Mariachi Violinist first surfaced in the late 60’s,  covering the world in a golden shower of  self-indulgent Mexi-Jazz-Blues.

 “But wait he’s so talented…  You have to admit that.” 

    Well you know what? So are the members of Dragon Force. Talent is overrated. Yeah, I wish I could find world class studio musicians that will do the dirty work so I can lay down jack-off solo’s the whole time too.  Yay, Me!   I don’t know who it was, but some brave souls stood up to this beast sometime in the 70’s…his lame shtick FINALLY got older than rancid tamales…and we finally were rid of him.

 Or so we thought. But, just like the Hydra. He returned, older, but no less dangerous. The new heads that had sprouted to replace the old ones….Pop Singers. NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Rob Thomas, Dave Matthews, Vanessa Carleton, Michelle Branch, Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! Same shit, different tune. So now we wait. Wait for either the beast to get to fat and return to it’s lair to die, or some…I don’t know…Hero, comes and rescues all of us from the awful spectre of Santana. I don’t know when or if that day will come. I just pray